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 Dokuja Aka Retcon

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Räven
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PostSubject: Dokuja Aka Retcon   Tue Dec 28, 2010 2:54 pm

I added thing after thing after thing. And I was never satisfied. Didn't feel right. Remade her visually. Her strengths and weaknesses. Many times.

So after some serious hard thinking I have concluded why I never seemed to be satisfied with the original Dokupoop.

I wanted to keep all the things she had ever done and achieved when in reality that isn't what I truly love about the character. What I love is the fact that she is a character doing her best to lead a calm and peaceful life while she holds a vicious spirit within her. An urge to devour people after toying with them she needs to suppress. So I have decided to commence with a full scale "Do it again, do it right" campaign. So, I sure would love all your comments, thoughts and ideas.

So the core of Dokujaka have always been centered around a few things:
She's immortal.
She holds a spirit within her that she battles daily.
She puts on a hard ass act, messing around with people and tricking them.
Despite the former she is always concerned about people she have met and will go to great lengths to make sure they're having no trouble other than what she causes them.

Immortal due to the spirit in her. The spirit is manipulative and vicious and have seduced Dokuja into a spiral of chaos and violence that lasted for centuries. Once she snapped out of it she was horrified, since then she keeps her distance from people whilst trying to help them from the shadows in an attempt to repent for the horrible sins from her past.


Dokuja was originally made in Ragnarok Online. She started out as a thief and later transitioned into assassination. In the original backstory this was explained as follows: Forced to steal in order to survive due to having lost her parents she quickly grew skilled at it and once she had become renowned the spirit convinced her to change the world by killing evil lords and greedy business men. This is where her career as an assassin starts and is also the first step down the previously mentioned spiral of chaos.
Due to her long life she have over time collected a fair amount of wealth and one of my later additions that I actually am pleased with is that she adopted a child though her relation with him is frosty. This is because aside from giving him a good life regarding wealth she didn't exactly shower him with love.


All written from the top of my head so if you don't get something feel free to ask me to explain. <.<


So the character I aim to create is:
An immortal woman who puts up a facade of happy and confident behaviour, often tricking people or pulling pranks on them for a good laugh and often in a way that in the end is funny for the victim as well. Having plenty of money she is free to do what she wants at all times and often uses them to shift powerful people into her favour wether it's for her own benefit or to help someone out. She's driven by a need to do good deeds to make up for all the bad she caused. She is terribly alone. She is at times in conflict with the spirit which makes her aggressive and she sometimes ends up doing bad things due to its influence.

Visually she is meant to be easy on the eyes but those looking at her would find her appearance uncanny, like something isn't right. One of her eyes have usually been having some sort of supernatural appearance though I don't know if this is something I want to keep.

. . .

So yeah... I would appreciate all comments and thoughts and that cause I want to mend my favourite character and my own mind haven't been enough so far. ;_;
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Edward
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PostSubject: Re: Dokuja Aka Retcon   Tue Dec 28, 2010 7:32 pm

I am intrigued with and fond of the bare-bones character concept you've just shown us Dokuja is. I like the idea of someone who is genuinely true, kind and light-hearted despite having to deal regularly with a raging internal battle--it's just such a complete, whole, human idea, that if you stripped away all the fantasy elements, you could easily expect to meet a real person who's just like that.

Unfortunately, I don't know Dokuja as well as I might like to, and I'm not familiar enough with the nuances of her character to be able to offer any kind of advice concerning changes, physical or otherwise.

What about her makes you unsatisfied, and makes you want to change her?

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Räven
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PostSubject: Re: Dokuja Aka Retcon   Tue Dec 28, 2010 8:11 pm

Well I've always felt the need to slap on one million things to really make people understand she's not an ordinary person and also because I just felt I had to, to make her feel powerful. What I've done now is strip her down to all the elements that have always been the same. I felt that all those things have gotten in the way of how I really want to RP her. I just want her personality and the powers and means needed to RP her fully. Confidence and money is about all she needs to that end.
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Ulrin Lightbringer
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PostSubject: Re: Dokuja Aka Retcon   Wed Dec 29, 2010 4:42 am

If you work her out decently, that feel of power will roll in itself. Let me give an example of a char concept I once made for a story, one that might bear some resemblance to what you're trying to make for Doku.

To make the history short; He's a man who never directly caused great evil, but he did so through inaction. He had the power and means to stop something and he chose not to, regretting this for the rest of his immortal life.
He exiled himself into the life of a hermit, travelling from village to village. Here he picked out the people who had it worst and played an innocent little trick on them. In the end, this trick rewarded them with money, goods or a magical blessing, whatever they needed most at that time. He'd disappear before they could personally thank him, taking his joy from seeing a smile on their face. It also sort of added to the spreading idea he was a spirit, or perhaps a small benevolent god.
Then, under the guise of something more powerful, he'd very rarely venture into courts and the homes of the rich and powerful. Preferably the ones who have people suffering under their leadership. He'd scheme up a trick for them that either lead them to see the error in their ways, or to their grim demise if they failed to see beyond their own pride. Their death was usually related to the type of pain inflicted on the populace, ranging from diseases to famine and worse.

There's a few differences with Doku's concept. He doesn't have a spirit he has to fight, instead he has to fight himself. He's in a constant internal struggle between making up for his mistakes and giving up to waste away somewhere. There's also a bit of evil leaking through in the form of murdering those he deems unworthy of ruling, comparable to the times when Doku loses it. He also uses tricks and power rather than his wealth alone to achieve his goals, but that's just a nuance.

Anyway, hope it gives you some inspiration.

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Räven
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PostSubject: Re: Dokuja Aka Retcon   Wed Dec 29, 2010 12:47 pm

Yes after spending the day thinking about it I've decided to give her a slight supernatural touch. No real powers just something that allows other people to recognize something specific about her that is out of place if they wish, but if you're not paying attention to it she will appear to be like any other person. I think it is time for me to write the application.
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